Hi Sarah,
LOL - I don't know why, but for some reason I didn't see that there were already replies to your post Sarah. So anything I've said has probably already been said, but oh well... ;-)
So glad you've found this site, and also so glad you've finally been diagnosed and are on your way to being able to deal with what has been going on for so long. I know that must be both a relief and yet be throwing a lot of confusion into the mix as well.
You seem to have a very upbeat, positive attitude about learning about your condition and staying positive will help you so much in the long run. It's perfectly natural to be freaked out, especially when we first find out we have these things. I'd be a little concerned about someone who wasn't!
You said your GP made the DX of AVM, but didn't say what, if any, tests were conducted that made her come to this diagnosis. I presume you've had an MRI at least? When you have your appointment with the neurologist s/he will likely want you to have an MRI if you haven't already, and maybe even want another one even if you have. The 'gold standard', or the usually definitive test for diagnosing AVM, the exact location and other information about it is called an angiogram. My guess is that you will have an angiogram at some point - either early on, or at least before any kind of treatment is carried out.
From there, depending on the location, size, etc. of your AVM your neuro doc will decide what, if any, treatment is appropriate for you. Treatment could be resection, which is to surgically remove the AVM, clipping, embolization which is to 'fill' the AVM with a material such as coils, onyx glue, other types of glue, or alcohol (you can ask Shalon abut alcohol embo), or, it may be determined that the AVM isn't treatable, or sometimes the doctors decide it's best to leave it alone for a while, the 'wait and see' approach. Personally, if any treatment option is available, I'm not comfortable with my AVM not being treated at all. But I've had a bleed, too, and I don't want to have another one.
The information you'll be learning regarding AVM can definitely be scary. But if you look at it as if you're arming yourself by having the information you'll be so much better prepared to deal with whatever path this takes you on. This is a rare condition, but fortunately there are many more doctors and hospitals treating this now. Just make sure you're seen by someone who has as much experience in diagnosing and treating AVMs as possible. You may have to do some research to find someone appropriate where you live, and this site is a good place to start. Most likely there will be someone here who can help out with almost any question or situation you may have - after all, we've all been there where you are now, essentially at the beginning, and have had, and will always have, questions ourselves.
I'm sorry I don't really have advice about dealing with this condition and your children, as I don't have any. But there are many folks here who can help with that, I'm sure.
Keep learning, try not to let the information get to you, and know that now that you know what's been causing your problems you're well on your way to being able to have something done about it. Stay positive, lean on us here when you need us, keep coming back and please, let us know how you're doing and what happens with your neuro appt. on the 21st.
Tori