I think this could fall under either emotional support or general avm discussions - so moderators - feel free to move it if you want.
I went and saw my primary care doc this morning - annual physical schedule from August of last year. He sat down and said, “Well, you’ve certainly had a year…” (I nominate him for understatement of the year)
We then got to talking about what’s going on and what’s happening and how I’m feeling and how I’m feeling emotionally about all of it and how the pain levels are and so forth. I got him to laugh when I told him that my left ear sounds like Alvin and the Chipmunks when I block off hearing to my right ear.
But then he had some really important things to say, which is why I share them with you - because you all matter to me. He said that yesterday he had a patient in who he had to tell him he had Parkinsons. That patient had a choice. He could wake up today and think, I have Parkinsons, my life will never be the same. And it won’t. I have Parkinsons and I can’t… and on and on and he can let Parkinsons control him.
Or he can say, “Yes, I have Parkinsons, but I can still _______ and I can do ________ and I can ________ and establish a new purpose to life.” Yes, his life will never be the same, but he can still find meaning and worth and challenge in what he can do and what he wants to do in his new life.
We also talked about the fact that I should lose weight and that exercising is hard with the headaches and the balance issues. He recommended that I consider walking laps at the grocery store (it’s a big store) with a grocery cart - until I’m confident enough - though I might be confident enough to go out now - if I don’t go too fast.
He said to me, “Tom, you know what I think you need to do? You need to find a type of food or a type of cooking that is healthy that you like to do and take over cooking at home a couple of nights a week. You’ll have the time and it will give you a positive direction you can do that won’t feel like you are just treading water thinking about how much your head hurts or how many times you’ve almost fallen today. And then you can see, you can write, you can read, you can type- get something going that you can do with those that you feel passionate about. Don’t wait for Social Security, because they will take their time whether you are waiting or whether you are busy. Get busy doing something and you’ll feel better just because you won’t be thinking about it as much. Yeah, you still will - there will be days where taking out the trash and making breakfast is a good day, but there will be more days where it’s a medium to a good day because you were you.”
Now that’s obviously not a direct quote, but it did make me realize that in many ways I have been waiting - waiting for healing that probably won’t come, waiting for Social Security that is taking a long time - and I need to stop waiting for those and start getting busy with the new me.
So, questions for you:
I would love to find an online cook book/app where I could give each member of the family the chance to pick one dinner a month - assuming I’d do 2 a week - and then I’d have them to be abloe to prepare and shop in advance. Is there something like that out there? I’m a pretty decent cook when a recipe is set in front of me - but I know nothing about that part of it.
If someone (me) with a passion for social justice, for under privileged children, for reforming government, about technology and Christianity who loves to write asked you for ideas on where I should channel that - what would you say? And feel free to message me directly if you don’t want to “outloud” on here.
Thanks to all of you,
P.S. My computer crashed 1/2 way through this post - whoever enabled the auto save on draft feature - thank you!