This is my new tattoo:) It is a symbol of my struggle through the AVM illness. It´s my symbol of strenght and love. and how youre love for other people and their love for you can help you throgh anything.

Last night I sat and read my notebook that I´ve been righting since I became sick. I was amazed by all the things my family and me has foght us trough. Earlier in the day I was so tired of all this and woundered how long after this operation I was going to feel like this and what´s here to stay and what I can train back. I feel like I lost my self. The person I am now is not the one who became sick a year ago, and it´s not to the better. I´m having a really hard time accepting the new me. My doctors say it will take up to 3 years before thay can say whats permanent. patience has never been my strong side i guess but i really want to know what things I need to accept and try to make a new life around it.

I was a good mom and working hard at the same time as I was going to school lerning to work in the field of Criminology.
Now i can only have my kids for a few hours a day before i get to tired and headache. I cant read and understand what I´m reading. I have problems understanding what people is talking about and their actions. I feel really stupid some days.

But last night when i read about the AVM journey I suddenly understood what I have been through. An embolization in the brain is bound to have some affects. I guess I believed I was going to wake up healthy and fine. All the warnings was just not for me. And I really didn´t have a choise. If I haden´t done the operation I woulden´t be alive today.

So My life,My family to see my kids every day, and to be here for them even if i don´t have the energi I hade before is more than enoght. I can live with the affects after the embo because I´m alive and thats worth more to me than anything! I can hug my kids and they can hug their mom everyday. And I can still bring joy even though I might not feel so my self. I have come a long way since after the embo! I can do alot of things now that I couln´t six months ago!

I´m not giving up and I´m fighting my self through this and I´m gonne come out strong!

Love all and never give up fighting

thank you for sharing your feelings…this is helpful to me as I prepare for my embolization and surgery end of Sept. I like the essence of your tatoo…you are more powerful than the AVM. Blessings to you and your family.

Awesome tattoo and message!

Take care,


that is truly beautiful! I was hoping on getting another tattoo after I get my AVM removed.