I don't know what happened but I was cooking dinner (even though I have had absolutely no appetite for about a week or two) and my husband walked into the kitchen and was like (in surrender mode) "whatever I did, I'm sorry." I practically had no idea what he was talking about. I knew I was grouchy but didn't think it was bad enough for him to apologize; he's a dude, he doesn't apologize unless there's an absolute need. Of course, he kept on, "what made you so mad, babe?" Finally, I just blew up! "Idk wtf happened! It just happened! Leave me alone!" I don't even know where that came from. I actually planned on calmly asking him to give me a few minutes to myself LOL. Now I'm fine, like I was never angry at all, like I didn't explode at him when he was just making sure he wasn't behind enemy lines or under attack.
Um, is this normal? Shouldn't I be somewhat past the enraged fits of......rage????? I'm so ready to find my new normal, I can't wait for this to be over with. How much longer is the wait???????????????????????
Hi Kirsti. From everything I have been able to research…the frontal lobes affect emotions. You are not the only member dealing with this problem. I found an old discussion you might want to read…http://www.avmsurvivors.org/forum/topics/1543517:Topic:76781?xg_source=activity&id=1543517%3ATopic%3A76781&page=1#comments
Thanks Barbara. I've researched the frontal lobes a little bit and it seems that the right frontal lobe most especially is where the emotions reside. http://www.theentertaininghouse.com/2011/02/are-you-left-or-right-brained.html This site has an easy to read comparison of right brain vs. left brain. I'm glad you posted that conversation because I'm experiencing almost exactly what she was describing: sudden bursts of anger that happen for no apparent reason with no trigger in sight. I expected personality changes and I've read on this site that some people experience this for years after stroke or surgery but I don't recall reading anything about sudden waves of rage this long after surgery. My husband already told me he can handle the ups and downs (sadness/depression) but he admitted it's becoming increasingly difficult for him to not take my bursts of rage personally. He's been by my side through this for so long already, I'd hate for that to be the thing that pushes him away....