Hi. I’m sorry to learn of your predicament and how your AVM affects you. I wish we could sort all these things out through love and prayer!
The one thought that occurs to me is that a handful of US neurosurgery hospitals do offer a “second opinion programme” and would give a high-level assessment of whether they agree with your new neurosurgeon or whether you are more operable than he is saying. Such a thing can be done by sending reports and images from as far away as Australia for about US$100 or US$200.
It seems likely (given the scale of your AVM) that you’d only get an affirmation of your neuro’s view but if you wanted to get a view, an alternate view from respected hospitals, you could potentially do that from your armchair.
There are references on this site to second opinion programmes or via Google. If you want to consider it but can’t find how, let me know and I’ll help.
Very best wishes