AVM Survivors Network

Just bummed out today


I had a surgery to detach and reattach the muscles to my eye. To point it more normally and not straight in at my nose. That was a couple of years ago and now it’s almost back to where it was. It’s got me thinking about all the money wasted trying things that didn’t work.
Somewhere here there’s a silver lining. The value of hope. The things that did work. I don’t know.
It’s just the blues, I guess. At least I don’t have them as much as I used to.


I certainly hear your frustration Jeremy, and completely understandable. AVMers certainly deal often with trials and tribulations. From a personal perspective I think getting ticked off when we try and the result is not what we hoped, is a normal reaction. Your introspection is amazing, that ability to consider your thoughts and feelings objectively is not a widespread ability. One I am still trying to master. Take Care, John.



It’s great to hear from you.

I think don’t worry about the money. You can’t worry about money. Whenever I have to pay a bill that’s higher than I’d like, I always tell people “I’d only spend it on something else” (so no point thinking that having the money still would be a bonus. It always gets spent somehow).

We are currently have a “heatwave” in the UK which anyone in your part of the world would probably say “oh, that’s just summer” but summer in the UK usually lasts 9-5 Monday to Friday on weeks when you’ve got plenty on at the office and for 2 or 3 of the 7 days when you’ve taken the week off as holiday. If you’re really lucky on holiday, the rain is warm. At the moment, we’ve had good sunshine for quite a few weeks with almost no rain and the water supply companies are talking of restrictions.

So as it happens, my car needed its service this week and along with its 63,000 mile service, I asked to replace the battery in the key fob (to be sure I never get caught out by that fuss) and check the aircon. In cleaning my car recently, I found some damage underneath that looks like someone jacked up the car not at the jacking points, so next week it is already booked in to have that damage straightened out and repainted. Then the garage call me to ask for payment for the service. About £350 for the service but the aircon compressor is quite corroded and they believe the cause of poor cooling in the car, £800. Gosh. Having not been able to drive the car for 9 months last year, we already found earlier this year that the brake discs had corroded badly and had to replace those. I think the aircon compressor is another thing that sitting still for a long time has caused. I definitely don’t have a spare £800 despite it being the fullest summer we’ve had in the UK for 40 years. I’ve no idea why the jack marks are where they are. I’m almost tempted to think someone has jacked my car up with a view to stealing the wheels (and no care for where they’ve jacked it) but found the wheels locked on and so I’ve only noticed when cleaning the car.

So, I know this will be a lot less than you’ll have spent on your eyes but life presents these things and finds ways of spending our money. I hope you got some positive impact from having your eye straightened before – that it helped you feel better for a while. The shame is that it hasn’t lasted.

Stay positive. Remember, you’d only have spent it on something else!



Richard, wonderful post my friend, thanks for the perspective and making me smile, chuckle, be strong and take care,