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AVM Survivors Network

It was only a matter of time

Well, it happened.

Not the way I thought it would, but it happened.

Part of me is mad that it happened, part of me feels sorry for myself that it happened, and still another part of me thinks it’s no big deal so don’t worry.

What happened?

After 19 months of dealing with vestibular issues, cognitive issues, a probable auditory processing disorder (can’t get in to the neuroPsych doctor until March of 2020), my balance gave out and I fell.

I actually fell out of bed.
(pauses for the chuckles that I know are coming).

So I have become very well adapted to hanging on to things to make sure I stay upright, but this one didn’t work. Alarm went off, I turned the alarm off and in the process knocked my glasses off the night stand. Especially since this, I am pretty much visually worthless with out the glasses. So, I reached down on the floor to where the glasses should be (this is not the first time I’ve done this) and suddenly something hit the side of my head really hard, my knee hurt and I was on the floor. WFT?

Turns out I moved out too far, center of gravity shifted, and down I went. So I have an achy knee with some rug burns on it, I have a nice black and blue just outside of my right eye (glad it didn’t hit my eye) and a dampening of the personal pride with it all.

I knew it would happen eventually. I knew it wasns’t possible to have the kind of balance issues that I struggle with to not fall eventually. We joke at home - our middle child (child she just turned 27) has balance issues without any sort of medical condition. She has been known to actually fall up the steps.

Oh and my attorney said that it certainly won’t hurt me to show up Wednesday for the hearing with a black eye because of balance issues.

Smile a bit, chuckle if you will and then remember that the power of this group is in large part providing a place outside of your family where you can share this journey.

Here’s to no more falling for… Oh, I don’t know, no more falling for now?

TJ

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@TJ127 I am so sorry you fell - I sadly know the feeling - The positive is yes it will be positive to show up to the hearing with a black eye due to balance issues.
I had to get rid of most of pants pjs due to falls just from reg walking. I fall some how putting on my pants seems to be my favorite way of falling. I now know after years of falls that I must sit down to do this. I think the problem is we look fine to most people and we are not. I am so glad at Stanford they always ask have you fallen in 30 days is now standard. Good luck on Wednesday- Let us know how it goes.
Hugs
Angela

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I’m glad the result was lesions, abrasions and contusions and nothing is broken. The added bonus of visual evidence for Wednesday hopefully is beneficial. I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow and wishing the best. Take Care, John.

This is so true. And so sad.

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Thanks. I will post an update later tomorrow. I’ve been told the formal answer could take up to 30 days. I’m hoping that about 20 minutes into it, the judge says, “Mr. V, it’s obvious that you meet the qualifications.”

From what I hear, that rarely happens but it does occasionally.

TJ

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Thanks for sharing. I’ve reached out of bed to pick up my reading glasses too. I’m pretty clumsy and drop my glasses all the time. I had already decided that it was a bad idea, so no more of that for me.
I’ve only fallen once, right after my rupture. I hit my cheek on a rock wall, and had quite a bad bruise. I actually felt bad for my husband, who kept getting nasty looks.

Thanks for making me chuckle this morning. Your writing is so descriptive, I almost feel like I saw you fall out of bed. I hope the hearing goes well and that the black eye works in your favor!

Hey TJ,

Well, there won’t be no chuckles from me, I’ve done it too. No funny haha I can assure you of that.
Best of luck with the hearing, hope all goes in your favour. But even if it doesn’t, there is still hope, still an avenue. I had my Social Security application rejected, I challenged it in court and lost. But I obtained further reports and applied again and got it approved on the first try with the new documentation.
As they say ‘There are many ways to skin a cat’, there are other avenues you can take to reach a ‘satisfactory’ outcome.

Best of luck TJ
Merl from the Moderator Support Team

I think I can relate. It helps me to embrace these setbacks as a trade off for trying to stretch the comfort zone. It just really sucks to be reminded of our limits but how sweet it is to successfully reach beyond them.
I fall all the time. I’ve taken out pictures, tables, & bushes along the way. But, I cut my grass all by myself for the first time in 5 years.

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I really admire your attitude. Stay positive, my friend!

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Hi Pal, You got me scared there for a moment. Black eyes and bruises I can deal with. (I’m not calling you a woosy. lol) It’s just that with my seizures I’ve fallen so many times I can’t count. Biting through my tongue was memorable. The pies de resistence was breaking my femur. Until that moment I thought I had actually experienced pain. Two craniotomies, AVM bleed, spinal taps and arteriograms all paled in comparison. What made it even more splendid was that I was alone and the phone was across my house. I wish I had a silent movie of my journey across the floor. When the medics got there and cut my pjs off and shot me with morphine all I could do was thank the lord they weren’t expensive pants. Yeah right!
The recovery was also something special. I definitely found out who my true friends were.
At this point you may be wondering if I am going to go on indefinitely about nothing. So, if you insist, I’ll say something serious. I’m glad you didn’t get hurt too badly.
I’ll also bore you with some inspirational drivel. Somehow laying around for weeks reading randomly I got ahold of “A Walk in the Woods”, a book about an experience of hiking the Appalachian Trail. I got it into my head that I would do that even though my leg looked like an ugly pencil. I ordered a back-pack, hiking boots, tent, etc. and I started walking with my walker to the end of the driveway…then the gym.
About 8 months later I was ready to do all of the state of Massachusetts. I took practice hikes and then I started in Connecticut. It took about 4 days to realize I wasn’t as ready as I thought. At this point you are probably asking yourself the same question. Is Greg ready to get to the inspirational stuff?
With my tail stuck between my legs I called my friend to pick me up. But the good thing was that the dream/goal of the long hike put me on a trajectory that still benefits me 4 years later. So my friend make an utterly stupid ridiculous goal for yourself. With your splendid balance you could traverse Niagara Falls on a tight-rope…
Be safe, Greg

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