Dayz go by in a blur!

Well Wendy had a rough couple of days. She has been working hard on her PT, but her bad headaches cut that time short. She got a CAT scan today to see if there is any changes. Results will be known FRI or SAT. She feels down cause she cause 110% effort but headaches gets the best of her. Medication helps but with some bed rest and heating pad on her head helps a bunch. Her progress continues to improve. With her lifting her affected leg and moving her arm too.
With all this positivity i believe all this is starting to get to me. With some nights lack of sleep. Difficult to concentrate in the day. Feeling anxious to see my wife everyday. I mean i have been able to do every thing until about a week ago. Ill open up to you guys but i cant stop to think about us, before this all happened! I feel empty, and honestly I miss my wife. She was so bubbly and happy. I would come home and get love from her and it’ll wipe the stressful day at work. Now she is in pain and rehab to get better, shes not bubbly but understands that she needs to work to get better. I come home and its all empty, my two dogs stay at my parents house most of the time.
I just wanted to vent out a little. I know there are people in worst conditions, but its hard to compare when my heart aches for her. Truthfully some tears are rolling down my cheek right now, but i hope someone knows how i feel. I hope tomorrow treats me better! Each day hoping for the best, time flies by in a blur it seems.

You vent and I will listen. I’even crying with you .It all just get’s to you weather you have it or someone you love does. You need to let it out. YOU TALK WE WILL LISTEN


I can only imagine how hard this is for you. Of course you miss your wife!!! I am sure that coming home to the empty house each day is a very hard reminder of the struggle that Wendy is going through. And it is a struggle for you as well. You may not have been hit by the AVM, but you certainly are in the path of the shock waves! You are being impacted as well and because Wendy isn’t at home that must be very lonely. I am glad to hear that you are anxious to see her! That warms my heart to know that you not only miss her but that you can’t wait to see her each day. Such a tough time for the both of you.
Hang in there. Things will settle down and get better. I won’t try to pretend that this will be easy for either of you or that it will be quick. But it WILL get better.
And yes, there is always someone who has it worse, but that doesn’t mean that your feelings aren’t valid. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have the right to be frustrated and sad. And this is the perfect place to let out those feelings. We won’t judge you because we have all been there. This site is a “safe” place for you to vent. I know sometimes it is hard to share all of those feelings with even close friends and family. And sometimes it is easier to share it here, where we get it, and we are also a little more “abstract” in terms of people you know. I think that actually makes it easier to open up.
I hope this Friday treats you well and that you are able to get through the day and back to your wife! Stay positive and strong, but when you are feeling down be sure to unburden yourself on us!

I have had a constant headache since 3 months before my first surgery…so I know how your wife feels. As time goes on I pray that it goes away and if it doesn’t go away I pray she will be able to find some way of cope with it. Has been over 2 years and 1 month now for me…and I think I have learned a lot of ways to cope with it or make it a little easier. but it is still a challenge every single day. Everyday seems to go by and I cant really remember much about it. One thing I have learned to do is biofeedback, if your wife hasn’t looked into this yet…she needs to. Also accupunture, I have tried that several times, didnt work for me but it might for her. Stress can also cause headaches to get worse so stay away from things that are really stressful. Also keeping the head and face cool for some reason helps with headaches. That is what I was told by my specialist so our freezer is full of ice packs. I also try to take a 45 minute nap every afteroon to help with my head. And of course the normal round of everyday meds. If she hasn’t tried some of these I would recommend for her to look in to them. Also a tyramine free diet helps…nothing with aged meats but turkey and chicken, nothing with red dyes, or cheese’s, nothing with transfats or high saturated fats, no chocolate or caffeine. If you go to and just type in 'tyramine free diet" it will show you everything here and explain to you what tyramine really is, so I would go check that out. I hope I have been of some kind of help to you and your wife. If you have anymore questions ask away…:slight_smile:

Hang in there JW. I can’t imagine coming home each day to an empty house, my heart goes out to you. I will continue to pray for both you and your wife that each day will get better. Sometimes it is harder on the spouse. My first embo did not go so well and my husband went through alot. He traveled each day 1 1/2 hours down and 1 1/2 hours back while I was in the hospital. Not only the physical strain but the emotional strain he went through worrying when he could not be with me. You are a wonderful husband and a strong support for your wife. Take care of yourself

Hello Johnny. Hugs and hugs to you and Wendy. O.K.-even the dogs get some hugs…
Johnny you know you have to “hit the wall”, yes? At some point even crash and burn.Some people hit the ground so hard-the GROUND hurts. These are all of the parts of going through this experience and moving forward. There are even times when backward IS forward and there are times to just be tired-or sick and tired-or lonely and tired and sad…You feel what you feel. Go with it. Same for Wendy love, it is time perhaps to cry until you laugh again and laugh until you cry and all the way round again.
Every day is different-has always been so. These most different days are more reason to celebrate the smallest gifts and claim boasting rights for working so very hard to make it through another day. All the more reason to be happier, sadder, more tired, more energetic,more alone and more together. I tell you nothing you do not know already. However I tell you-in case you do not yet know; This will not last forever-progress will be made and the ups and downs will balance and now will blend with tomorrow and yesterday is always a part of where we go and who we are and oh the wonder of it all that brings to us the hope and promise of tomorrow…and all the parts that make us whole…You and Wendy and your family are in my prayers. Be good to you take care of you. You are a good one young man-she must be VERY cool that woman of yours…

Well Wendy has been good, her CAT SCAN came back showing improvement. There is less swelling in her skull. Also wendy can make the peace sign and other specific finger gestures too(LOL). She misses her mom, she left back to Dominican Republic for 2-3 weeks then she will be returning. She says im her Rock, and I help her get by day by day. Which I love to hear her say that. Im trying to continue to be her rock. Well hopefully this week treats her well since she has been good the last 3 days. So she can continue her PT with no pain! Its crazy that Xmas is right around the corner, felt like just last week it was Halloween then this happened.