I recently had a conversation with someone I have known through work for about 7 months. We realized that we have each had gamma knife, her for a tumour located in a difficult area, and me for my AVM. We had a great discussion, about finding out and all the usuals. She had limited support from some of her family, she waited to tell most of them and many were angry with her. They showed little support after, or understanding. My experience was the opposite so I am sure thankful.
We talked a lot about the ability to understand the things like being tired, and the fear of new aches and pains that may be related. Others often say, I get tired to, its your age, everyone gets headaches, my arm tingles too…she basically has stopped mentioning these things. She was really happy to have an ear, who while we are all different, our understanding is much better.
I gave her the example for myself, once being allowed to lift weights again. I was in the gym doing incline dumbell press, I leaned back gave a push and immediately was hit with an “oh no, somethings wrong”, right sided weakness! I put the weights down, look in the mirror and smile - symmetrical, stick my tongue out - straight, give the finger squeeze on each side - no difference. Couple of breaths - seem to be okay, I look at the weights and the right one is 5 pounds heavier…
Prior to my AVM discovery, bleed and gamma knife the first place my mind would have gone was that I had different weights, now it was not. That struck a cord with her, and shows how our perspectives can change. She completely understood that, many wouldn’t nor perhaps should we expect them too. I hope she knows now that she has a caring ear if she ever needs one.