Ohh Elsie, I completely understand and empathise with your situation. I’ve needed to ‘start all over again’ a few times. Now I say a few times, but none of them have been the same in recovery time nor symptoms, so trying to compare is impossible. Short of the (no pun intended, but) mind blowing headaches, each has had it’s own unique recovery.
This may sound cold, but that is not my intent. As patients it is impossible for us to look at these things clinically, we always put emotions into the equations, it’s natural. But if we can think a bit outside of ourselves I’ve found it a bit easier to consider.
For example, what are the options? Operate or not? Let’s face it, they don’t recommend surgery unless they seriously consider it as necessary.
What are the risks of operating? Your surgeon should discuss these with you prior and will vary depending on location and severity.
What are the risks of not operating? A rupture. Results? Bad to very bad.
There really, honestly, is no ‘upside’ to any scenario but the reality is we have very little to no control over any of it. From here it’s all up to the dr’s and that loss of control was/is something I have a real battle with every time. If someone’s in control of me, it’s me. But when it comes to surgery I have to relinquish that control and I HATE IT, but I have to accept it, I have no choice in the matter. And for me, personally, that is one of my biggest stumbling blocks.
My only suggestion here is do not be crossing that bridge until you have surgery confirmed as necessary, but once confirmed it truly is all outside of your control.
And that is the cold, hard reality of it all.
Merl from the Moderator Support Team