This post is straight to the point in some sections and it’s meant to be because it’s the truth so please don’t take it as downplaying any emotion you have or experience. You’re emotions and experiences are unique and valid. This is my story and I think many could relate
It’s been a while since I visited here for many reasons but thought I’d pop in and hope everyone is going the best they can given their circumstances
I just wanted to share some things I’ve learnt in the last couple of years
When I had my brain issues, I had a lot of other stuff going on in life too. Just as major as my brain and needing surgery.
What I’ve learnt though in hindsight is that we as humans have a fantastic thing we do called adaptation and we adapt to the circumstances
Some things take time. Prior to surgery, after surgery, and all in between I was always worried. Every little pain or ache or sensation, I was very worried.
I cannot speak for all but I can say in my case, over time I accepted the fact of what I had and what could happen at any given moment
I have also adapted to the pain to a degree. I still need paracetamol and eye drops constantly but the pain is more acceptable in some way
Tbh life has not got any better overall HOWEVER my life has got a lot better.
What I mean by that is once I accepted what I had and things can happen anytime, I became free, I became happier with simple things
I now go to gym regularly (who knows if that’s the best idea - my nueros all think different lol) but I’m hitting pbs, feel great doing it, and my blood pressure is down
and I do some work i can do I can feed myself (and that’s about the limit of my life)
I don’t see my son. I haven’t for 1.5 years and he was my best friend.
I won’t bore you with all the other details of why life isn’t great!.. what I’m trying to say is despite the setbacks and there’s been more lately, I’m a happier, calmer, nicer person than I ever have been
Like I said, it takes time and we are all different but I recall the moment I said to myself, STUFF this… I’m just going to live life. And it’s been great since. My life itself is far from great but how I react and how I find happiness is great which in turn makes my life great
I’m hoping that made some sense and can help someone that although today, this week, this year is bleak, you may find yourself more happy in a worse situation than you were before
If you can’t change something, there’s no point worrying about it as you’re just making yourself feel bad all the time and if something bad is going to happen, it will anyway. Thinking positively probably makes it less likely but even if it doesn’t, at least you were smiling the rest of the time
This is NOT downplaying how serious these things are. It’s not downplaying your emotions you have. It’s scary stuff and if you’re going through it right now, it’s more than valid to feel confused, angry, scared, whatever you’re feeling.
What I’m saying is that after a while, I truly finally felt at peace and nothing much bothers or worries me at all anymore and that’s solely because of the ordeals I’ve been through. The ordeals weirdly have made my life better by how I think. So there is hope, it just takes time and an attitude and you’ll come out realising you’re stronger than you thought I’m sure
I also worked through a lot of life stuff with a therapist and I must say, it helped me immensely. I would strongly recommend anyone who’s considering a therapist and can do so, to do it
Although this applies to everyone,
I think especially to those who have just been diagnosed or new to this and have serious emotions about it. Its normal. But you will cope. Things change and you will see how strong you are
I’m the same medically as I was 12 months ago, life itself is probably worse, but happiness I’m 1000% happier and at peace than I was 12 months ago and that’s all that matters in my eyes
Never lose hope people. It will come