6th Month follow up

Well hello

I had my 6th month follow up for my gamma knife surgery. I drove up on april 19th, stayed at the worst hospitality house ever! The air conditioner was broken and there was no tv.. MISERABLE!! so then the next morning i woke up at 3am cause i was way too nervous my appointments that i couldnt sleep. This was the first time I went to see my neurosurgeons alone. We live about 2 and a half hours from my doctors so i was scared and nervous. The day of my appointments i got to the research center an hour early cause i was scared i was gonna be late or get lost. Got my MRI done and then went to see my neurosurgeons to hear the results. I was shanking and was about to cry just cause I knew what I wanted to hear but was scared i wouldnt hear it. The Nurse practioner came in and asked me about how ive been feeling and the symptoms ive been experiancing and evry time i said something she looked at me like i was crazy! I told her i have been having the worst migraines ive ever had, I got to the ER at least once month in just amazing pain that makes me sick and i cant manage it. My left side is weaker and my memory is a little rough.

She then went to go tell my neurosurgeon and as soon as he came in my heart was in my chest. I was expecting him to say oh you have no reason to be feeling like this your all better! And part of me really wanted him to say that.. But no he said every symptom ive been experiancing is due to the large amount of brain swelling i have from the gamma knife surgery. He said the AVM looks like its starting to close off but it is still about the same size as it was before. He said most f the swelling is on the gross motor plate that controlls my left side so thats why me left side is freaking out and that alos why my headache are unberable. The pressure is just soo great it makes me sick. he put me on a months course of steroids and he said instead of coming back in 6 month again i have to come back in 3 months cause he is worried about the swelling. He said yes the swelling is very painful but it is a good sign cause it means im reacting to the raidation.

I left there feeling kinda realived but also sad, discouraged and a funny feeling in my gut like i wanted to cry like never before. I Think I was telling my self not to get my hopes up but I still let my self. I just wanted him to say congratulations no more AVM!! but he didnt. Im over being in pain, im over being restricted, im over being sick, IM OVER IT ALL!!!!!!

Anyways just thought i would give an update.. I love ya'll so much and thanks for always encouraging me!!

Brittany XOXO :)

Dearest Brittany, I’m so sorry that you didn’t hear what we all hoped you would hear. I pray that the new med will help you with the pain. Now my prayer will be that when you go in 3 months, the news will be so much better…Keep the Faith. Louisa

Oh.. my dear Brittany. I hate to tell you this but, it does take time for the radiation to do it's job. I was just as inpatient as you are when I had mine done. To my knowledge, the brain swelling is one of those things that has to go down on it's own (with some help from the meds). Hopefully, the meds will help you rather quickly. Those migrains stink, to say the least. I get sick from mine too. There is nothing worst then throwing up when you have such a severe headache. Huh? No one ever said: "Life is fair." Because of that, I believe we do have to learn how to "roll with the punches." It took me a long time to come into acceptance of my illness and some days I still strugle with it. One thing I have learned from it is, I now take every moment of my day, one step at a time. I've gotten a lot better at not pushing myself beyond my limits now. I take breaks when I need to, I sit down when I need to and so forth. By me doing this, it helps my day go a lot easier and less trouble-some.

Don't give up on your dreams yet... They can still come true. :) Just because there is a delay in your plans, doesn't mean they won't happen for you. (wink)

Ben

Well Phooey…that does sound like a rotten day!

Thanks everyone! its just an other struggle im gonna have to learn to get through. Im trying really hard and with the help of ya'll and my family I WILL overcome this.... eventually!

Love ya'll :)

Brittany, Hope things get better for you, Sorry the doctor didn't tell you what you wanted to hear. I hope the pain goes away. I know how you feel about being over all of this. I always say this is just a bump in the road and I will be back on the high way eventually. Probably the slow lane bt i"ll be there. Lots of prayers sent your way.

Tonna

Thanks sooo much need lots of prayers! yucky steroids are making me swollen and feelin icky.. hopefully they will start working soon... Love ya'll!!!!

Brittany :) smiles