Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by StarieNite on January 4, 2012 at 8:26pm

My son hasn't had new anger issues, but he does lose his patience easily and seems to sometimes be on the verge of tears over trivial things.

Permalink Reply by Janice Brown (Andrew's Mom) on January 4, 2012 at 9:18pm

Kathy, I think it sounds like a good idea to see a nueropsychologist or therapist of some kind. It sounds like he may be experiencing some depression, not necessarily just anger. Fear and grief can trigger some of that behavior, also. His whole world was flipped upside down. He's having to come to terms with the fact his life is changed forever. As an adult I didn't always know how to deal with everything that was happening to my son. I can only imagine everything going through his head. It sounds like you are headed in the correct direction. Time also helps to heal, too. Hang in there.

Permalink Reply by Kathy (Jacob's Mom) on January 4, 2012 at 9:43pm

Janice, Thanks for the input and the assurance that I am moving in the correct direction. As you know it is so hard to make these life changing decisions for our children. I am hoping the psychologist will be able to help him. I am hoping part of his emotions are due to "normal" tween aged horomone changes, but the anger and crying has continued to get worse since he has had his craniotomy. Thanks again for your support.

Permalink Reply by Kelly Nelsen on January 4, 2012 at 9:28pm

It could be a result of the surgery -- Jacob's brain was messed with, and it can take a solid year to heal from the trauma of surgery. The limbic system is located in the general area toward the inside of the temporal lobe, and this area is where emotions are processed, in large part. It may be that the "messed with" parts of his brain are pressing on that area, causing him to be more emotional. As his brain heals from the surgery, his emotions should become more and more normal. This is just my speculation, though. After my son's surgeries, he experienced some memory issues that slowly resolved themselves (for the most part) as time passed. What does his neurosurgeon have to say about it?

Permalink Reply by Kathy (Jacob's Mom) on January 4, 2012 at 9:48pm

Kelly, We brought this up to our neurosurgeon and he is in full support that he sees a psychologist. Our neuro told us it may just be that he has not be able to participate in Gym and recess and sports teams with his classmates and feels different. However, he has been back at gym and recess and things aren't getting better.
Odd that you mention the temporal lobe, Jacobs AVM was located in his left tempural lobe. I am hoping with healing we see an improvement I just feel like my sweet,polite boy has had the life sucked out of him.
Thanks for the support.

Permalink Reply by StarieNite on January 4, 2012 at 10:07pm

Kathy, I would contact your states Traumatic Brain Injury Association. They offer a lot resources as well.

Permalink Reply by Jaynied (Jake's Mam) on January 10, 2012 at 3:45pm

Hi Kathy
Jake had his craniotomy in April 2011 and we have had problems with anger. He seems to go through phases, but he can lose control completely and nothing you can say to him seems to penetrate his rage. He pushed me off the bed the other day because I beat him playing football on the XBox. These episodes really scare me because I dont know when he'll stop, or what it means. other times he is just the sweetese buy, and he is always very sorry and tearful after one of his outbursts, though it can take hours before this happens, and he'll stay angry for that length of time.
I'm sure some anger is normal, considering what they've been through, and the injustice of it all. I guess all we can do is support them and reinforce they are loved no matter what. Good luck, Jaynie x

Permalink Reply by Kathy (Jacob's Mom) on January 10, 2012 at 6:02pm

Thanks for the reply Jaynie. My Jacob has such rages that the look in his eyes scare me to death he looks like he is ready to pound and not stop. He does do the same thing you described after one of his episodes then starts to cry and is very sorry for what he has done.
I see this double edge personality one time he can be raging and the next he is the sweetest thing you have ever seen. I have been trying to get him to do things to relax him, he started painting and began playing tennis so I am hoping this will help.
I am waiting to hear back for the pscyh department at the Childrens Hospital, after all he has been thru I think it will do him good to talk to someone.
Best of Luck to you too.
Kathy

Permalink Reply by Rosemary on January 25, 2012 at 1:32pm

My son is the same way. He is 7 years old now and his avm ruptured in Nov 2010, he had a craniotomy immediately and then gamma knife surgery last June. He was out of school and in rehab for the year and is back in public school and doing really well. He's always angry and mean to his sister especially. The littlest things set him off. It just makes me so sad as I just want him to be happy! His friends are there for him and he's doing so well. I don't think he would sit still for a psychologist so I was hoping he'd find inspiration from a coach or someone else. I just feel so bad for him! I want him to be happy!

Permalink Reply by Kathy (Jacob's Mom) on January 25, 2012 at 1:40pm

Thanks for sharing your story Rosemary, We ended up seeing a psychologist at the childrens hosptial he was treated at we have only had one session but in our discussion she has assured me this is very common and they have the right to be angry. They have been thru so much at such a young age, that most adults couldn't deal with what our children have been thru. We have our second session today, if anything it lets him know that this is normal but the does need to learn to control his anger. I agree I just wish they could be happy children again! Hang in there.

Permalink Reply by Rosemary on January 26, 2012 at 1:29pm

Thanks Kathy and best of luck. Curious to see what they say. I have been doing a fair amount of research on this topic and apparently it is to be expected. I know it takes alot of patience on our part, which I have, but again, like I said, i want to learn how to help my boy.

Permalink Reply by Kathy (Jacob's Mom) on January 27, 2012 at 10:52am

Our appointment went great, she has assured me that this is normal and we are now looking at ways for Jacob to manage his anger, and so far so good. She also mentioned that sometimes after a child has a craniotomy, teachers etc... take things that are normal kid stuff and it intensifes because they have had brain surgery....(hope that makes sense) The therapist has also meet with me and has assured me that I am doing everything right and this is common, this is refreshing to hear.
I am really glad we made the decision to meet with the therapist and so is Jacob he has been very responsive to her and enjoys going.
I know you mentioned in your other post that your conern was your son not being able to sit still, our therapist plays games with Jacob and does legos and get him to really open up.

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